School Supplies, School Supplies, School Supplies

Let me start this entry by explaining that I was once a high school teacher.  I understand kids need supplies for class.  I also understand that the older the kids get the less intensive the list becomes (unless of course you are in the 6th grade and need 8 rolls of Scotch tape).  As a teacher, buying supplies was the cost of doing business and I liked buying supplies (this was before I actually had three children with three different lists).  Let’s just say I’m a little grumpy about the whole community supply thing that happened by surprise this past week.

My tween has hit the middle school and came equipped with a huge list of supplies.  Eight rolls of Scotch tape (of which I only purchased two).  What they plan to do with eight is beyond me but I’m not buying more until we use the first two.

The tween arrived home on the first day to explain that his teacher would be collecting his tape (needed for two classes), loose leaf note paper (needed for several classes), composition notebook, tissues, hand sanitizer, and highlighters (also used for several classes).  I asked how he was going to use some of these things for other classes when she had them all…he didn’t really have an answer but could read my unhappiness about the situation.

I debated sending an email to ask.  I tossed the thoughts many times with my husband who is totally against community supplies.  Today I asked my friends who basically told me to suck it up and take one for the team.  I didn’t want to but decided I’d let it go.  Just get some more highlighters, tape, and paper.

Turns out I didn’t have to spend so much mental energy on my supply issue.  The tween solved it all by himself.  He decided to share with his teacher that his mom wasn’t happy that she took all of his supplies and now he can’t use them for other classes.  She explained how she doesn’t want to upset any parents, that she is an understanding teacher, and wants to do her best to get along with everyone…so she gave him back his supplies!

I don’t know what we did to raise an 11-year-old boy willing to confront a teacher about his supply issue but I’m really proud of him today.

I am a little worried because the same teacher is his Language Arts teacher and he caught her using the word good rather than well .  Hopefully, he will keep that one to himself.  However, he is a little steamed under the collar about it.  I guess you could say the apples don’t fall far from the tree.

Aftermath of the Party

Well, they all made it through the first day.  All returned with happy smiles.  No one missed a bus.  The teen figured out the maze of the massive high school.  The tween is rockin’ middle school.  And, the queen, well she is always the life of the party.

I’m pretty sure the teen didn’t sleep at all the night before this glorious event.  I could hear him opening and closing his bedroom door.  At 4:45 a.m., I decided there was an intruder in the house and almost called the police but am glad I didn’t because I would have done nothing but reported a teen up on Facebook.  We are going to have to set some time limits on when it is appropriate to be logged on and the butt crack of dawn is just not the right time (not in the CST zone anyway).

The queen was up exactly two hours before the arrival of the bus.  We had plenty of time for viewing TV, getting a snack (for school), having breakfast, getting dressed, and putting on socks and shoes (no flip-flops).

After six hours of alone time, most of which I spent sobbing in the checkout lane at Jo-Ann’s, they finally starting stagering home.  The teen getting older really hit hard today.  Then I spent 45 minutes signing my name and making a list of all the things the teen needs for school.  For all my readers who aren’t at the high school stage just yet, they don’t give supply lists before school starts.

We had a great dinner of carry-out pizza.  We could have used a talking stick because everyone had so much to share.  The queen had to even raise her hand for a turn.  Normally, it is she who rules the conversation.

As I made my way through all the paper and signatures, I had a great conversation with the queen:

Me:  Queen, you need to come print your name.

Queen:  Why?  It goes back in my folder.  My teacher will know it is mine.

Me:  Because you are agreeing to follow these rules.

Queen:  What rules?

Me:  You are agreeing to do your best, to get plenty of sleep, turn your assignments in on time, eat healthy foods, be quiet so others can learn, and respect yourself, teachers, and classmates.

Queen:  Yeah, I can’t agree to that.

Me:  Are you serious?

Queen:  Yep, I can’t promise I can always do my work on time.

Me:  It says to do your best, they understand it might not always happen.  Plus, if you don’t sign this, there is lots of reading you are going to do about the not signing process and then you will have to sign that you don’t agree to the terms.  I sometimes wonder where this kid came from…the boys never questioned this kind of stuff.  They didn’t even ask what they were agreeing to do.

Queen:  Fine, I’ll sign but I’m not putting my last name.

And she wonders why I have a headache!  Bring on the Avil (queen speak for Advil)!

Let’s Get This Party Started

The big yellow buses will be rolling through my town tomorrow.  If it were up to me, they would come today, right this very minute.

It’s a little tough that the teen is headed to high school.  Wow, where do those years go?  But, it is time.  My house will be my own come tomorrow at 8:27.  It will be quiet and still–just the way I like it.

1. We have purchased the shoes.
2. Paid the book rental.  I think in the state of Indiana they do this to help prepare you for what it might be like when they start college.  Book rental is pricey.  Pricey like almost $200 per child pricey.
3. Purchased the supplies.  A great feature of our elementary school is the price of supplies already being added to that book rental.  I will take paying $25 any day over hunting for school supplies.  However, the tween had eight rolls of Scotch tape on his list.  He’s a little miffed that he won’t be taking that many with him.  I feel two is a good number.  Seriously, how many rolls of tape can one kid need?
4. Clothes are laid out.  For the teen and tween this is so super easy.  For the queen, we’ve been working on this outfit for at least a month.  The realization that today is the last day for flip-flops has sunk in.  Is it bad I told her the principal sent us an individual email reminding us that she can NOT wear them to school?
5. Lunch accounts all have money available for those school lunches.  Finger prints have been scanned.  Nothing like a finger print being needed to purchase a school lunch.
6. Locker combos have been practiced and all have been successful.
7. Orientations have been attended.  Pretty sure we are now up to date on all things school related when it comes to attendance.
8. Family meetings have been held.  Want to make sure we are all on the same page for those early morning starts.  The teen and tween will be sharing the bathroom and the same bus.
9. Bus routes and numbers have been scouted.

What have we not done?  Oh, just the summer homework packet.  Not that we didn’t work on it because we did.  Somehow throughout the summer parts of it were left unattended.  Just letting you know that the day before school starts is not the day to try to finish all that has been left behind.  So, as I’m writing this it is a constant stream…how do you spell kick, why, and the (which the queen sounds out as thee, that’s from learning to read on the East coast).

As my husband said early today, just 22 hours to go.  I’m down to about 18 now.  So let’s get this party started.  Put on those new clothes and pack those fresh notebooks.  The bus to learning is headed down the street!

Stresses of a Taxi Driver

Who knew going into being a mom that eventually your status in life would become that of taxi driver?  Point A to Point B consumes so much of my time.  Thanks to my standing firmly that each of my children will do something productive I have a whole hive to transport on any given day.  To those readers who don’t have children yet or don’t have old enough children, tread lightly on requiring activities.  We require them all to do at least something and try to keep it limited to two activities per child.  When you have three children, this means as many as six events could land on one calender date.

Yesterday, I was driving the queen to her first softball practice for fall ball.  Our local town has closed the softball complex for repair which is requiring us to play one town over.  We’ve lived in our new town for just a year and I hadn’t yet had the opportunity to adventure to where we needed to be until yesterday.

Needless to say I was lost.  Had to stop the car to call our coach.  Had to turn around and go back the way I came.  Missed my turn.  Had to make another turn to get back to the missed street.  Here was when the queen decides to get involved.

Queen:  You realize Ga-ran-dad got lost every time he was supposed to make a turn when he took me on that trip to St. Louis.  I don’t mean a few times.  I mean every single turn he missed.  I’m just saying you should know since you seem to be having the same problem.  Your car should come with a siren that shouts watch out for the crazy lady in the white Cadillac she doesn’t know where she is going.

Me:  Thanks, Queen.  I’ve never been where we need to go before.  Of course, I’m thinking….yes, I know he missed every turn.  I lived with him for half my life and still sometimes go on road trips with him.  And, where do you think I gained my sense of direction?

Queen:  You realize I’m probably going to be late.

Me:  Yep, but the coach knows we were trying to get there on time.  I do believe he might cut us a little slack this being the first practice and all.

Queen:  Yeah, we’ll see about that.

So, we arrive to practice.  Most of the team is out fielding balls.  We get to the field and what does the queen do…she goes to the dugout and has a seat.  Yes, you are reading that correctly.  All the fuss about being late and she is sitting in the dugout.

I had to sip my Diet Coke and say a little prayer that I wouldn’t get up and bing her with a ball.

The Week Began in Silence and Ended with a Bang

Because I now live closer to my parents (4.5 hours compared to 18) my children are taking advantage of summer visits!  This past week, the queen had the opportunity to stay with the grandparents.

There is a seven-year span between she and the teen.  Because of the age difference it is almost like having two separate families.  After this past week, I now know there is also a huge difference in the noise level in our house when the queen is gone.

It was so quiet in our house you could actually hear the constant hum of the refrigerator.  That my friends is what I call blessed quietness.  We all enjoyed the drama free week.

Of course all good things must come to an end.  Mine came crashing down Saturday as the teen, tween, and I headed out on the road trip to pick up the queen.  I’m going to share a little something with those of you that don’t have a teen boy–they stink–in a big huge way.  We were actually in the middle of getting in the car when I remember to do a deodorant check (oh the joys of parenthood).  Of course the teen doesn’t think deodorant is necessary but those of us going to be in close vicinity to him require his using it.  Instead of going for the stick, he whips out a can of Old Spice body spray.  Now, we don’t only have teen boy funk we are breathing a cloud of Old Spice (yet another joy of parenthood).  A huge debate pursues regarding the difference in body spray and old fashion deodorant.  Needless to say, I’m the one who won:  came down to either staying at grandma’s for the next two weeks or hanging out at home alone in his own Old Spice cloud.

As I prepare to make the trip back home with the queen and tween we realize the queen has left behind her softee (baby blanket with more hole than fabric).  The left behind blanket calls for massive sobs .  The sounds of her sobbing were so bad a man riding his bike actually got up by the car to ask if we needed help (really I can’t make this stuff up if I wanted to).

I decide that going back to grandma’s to get Softee has to be better than listening to that for another 4.3 hours.  We pull into the drive way and I realize my dad is still home.  I decide to let the queen go in search of the blanket and I’m going to make another trip to the bathroom (at my age there are never enough stops to use the potty).  The queen goes upstairs finds the blanket and I comment that I can’t find my dad when she comes back down.  She assures me he is upstairs in his room.  I figure I should at least let him know we were there and leaving again.  Here is how this conversation went:

Me:  Hey, Dad stopped by to find Softee.  Headed out again.

Dad:  You’re here at the house? (No, Dad I hooked up a transmitter and am talking to you through the light fixture) I looked for Softee and I can’t find it.

Me:  Really?  The queen just was up there and brought it down with her.

Dad:  The queen was up here?

Me:  Yep

Dad:  Really?  No way!  (The queen had entered my parents’ bedroom, retrieved the blanket, and come back downstairs as my dad was getting dressed.  Somehow he never saw her.).

So here we are on week three of only two children in our house.  Not as quiet this week but that’s okay.  I’m sure more stories will materialize.

What?! Were You Talking to Me?

There is a golden rule at our house.  It goes something like this, as soon as the hair dryer, vacuum, or stand mixer comes on there will be sudden emergency conversations that need to take place.  My children can go a full day (not that they ever have) and not talk to me or need my assistance but with the push of a button I will have all kinds of attention.

In the mornings when I flick on the hair dryer the world will suddenly be coming to an end.  Not that I can hear the world tumbling down but a shaky crying queen will soon be at my side.  Her situation usually has to do with Pop Tarts or her brother smacking her because, he the tween, wants to get in a few licks while the opportunity is there.

The vacuum cleaner drives them all wild.  The teen has suddenly found a new game…he will tell the tween that I yelled for him and he better find me quick.  Not like it should be hard to find me when the vacuum is running.  The tween will appear out of no where looking really scared (this makes me want to prove how powerful my Dyson really is).  I will have to shut it off to find out that his brother thought he was being summoned.  And, he of course wants to take the opportunity to let me know that they can’t hear the TV downstairs…This leads to the teen changing the channel while the tween is in my pursuit which leads to another argument that I can’t hear.  So thankful for the little blessings.

The stand mixer or even the food processor can bring down the house.  Usually, the stand mixer means I’m baking in large quantity and there may be a spoon or a beater to lick.  Huge amounts of conversations can be needed at this time.  My favorite joy is to be making something that requires powder sugar…a little can be thrown into the bowl causing a huge dusty cloud (beware that the dust cloud then involves weeks of cleaning).  The kids think I may be blowing up the mixer and will run like the dickens.  Oh yes, I have a way of finding my own fun.

The ultimate of the this golden rule is my taking a shower.  Moms have to be sneaky when it comes to this because earth shattering events happen while we are in the shower.  In late spring, I assumed the teen had gotten on the bus and headed to school (anyone with a teen knows, parents are no longer welcome at the bus stop after fifth grade).  As I was just rinsing the shampoo from my hair, I think to myself that I hear the teen shouting like crazy, but that can’t be because he should be long gone by now.  It doesn’t take long for the teen to find me because he has missed the bus (or at least he thinks he has).  He decides I should just jump from the shower into the car to taxi him to school.  Long story short, he found an alternative ride to school and wasn’t even late.  He was however a little put out that I couldn’t hear him in the shower. 

It’s a toss-up, the sounds of heavy machinery or the constant sounds of arguing.  Which will you choose?

I am the Mother of a Teenage Boy

At some point, that little bitty bundle of joy grows up and begins to prepare for the entrance to high school.  I know, some of you have one of those itty bitty bundles right now and can’t imagine this day will ever come.  But, I promise the day will come, when diapers are a thing of the past.  Sippy cups are unheard of.  Sleepless nights only come from drinking too much leaded Diet Coke past 4 p.m.  And, major melt down fits only occur when dinner is an eat it if you can reach it night rather than a traditional home cooked meal.

This I know to be true, no mom should have to turn 40 and her teen be going to high school the same year.  Something crazy happens to moms who are suddenly 40 and it doesn’t work well for this transition to high school.

As we are preparing for the stroll through those big doors, I have come to the conclusion that there are some things that could make this a better transition.  My idea is to get rid of the teenage girls.  I’m sure the teenage girl moms are feeling the same way about my boy.

Here’s the thing.  I’m a touch me not kind of gal and would really like it if all personal contact came to a screeching halt, especially now.  Just this past Saturday, I was dropping some food off to my teen when I encountered him interacting with his peers.  This sweet young lady was pawning all over my little boy (in my eyes anyway).  The best was how fast she flung herself to the other side of the room when I entered.  The teen hadn’t even noticed I was there yet so I’m not sure how she knew I was the mom but that’s okay because at least it meant she wasn’t touching him anymore. 

Another problem with the teenage girls, the clothes.  Holy smokes ladies, cover that stuff up.  I could really go for shorts that met at the fingertip or long pants (even those that drag the ground because they need to be hemmed).  When I taught, I’m sure my students thought I was the clothing police.   Now that I’m a mom of a boy with hormones and my own hormone problems of turning 40, I could be a whole clothing one woman SWAT team.

So parents of teenage girls, how about some work on modesty.  I’ll work on my son always wearing a shirt in public and showering every day.  If you ever see my teen in public with his underpants hanging out, please communicate that with me immediately.  I’ll be sure to secure some lace to those drawers–after that I’m sure they’ll never see the light of day.

Sounds of Summer

We have made it through the first full month and one week of summer break.  Seems like we have about the same amount left.  Being home with three kids and a husband working third shift makes the summer seem much louder than it surely is.

Mine goes something like this:

Queen:  I’m going outside.

Me:  Ok, did you put on sunscreen?  You know you need to wear it now because if you don’t when you become a mommy they will have to cut parts of your body off.

Queen:  Mom, you are so gross.

Me:  Just stating the facts.

In the background you can hear the fine spray of some SPF and then you can inhale the fumes.  Something tells me that there will soon be a problem with the exhaust of the spray on stuff.  I’ve recently switched to the lotion (it’s a lot cheaper and makes no noise).

Then, the door will open with a smuck sound and a click.  Every door in our house clicks when it opens but the smuck sound makes you think of being enclosed in an airplane.  For the next eight hours it will be an endless song of smuck and click, smuck and click.  Remember being a kid and your dad would yell, “Pick a place, darn it, in or out, but quit with the coming in and out.”  Oh yes, I’m repeating history at my house too.

Along with the door comes the constant hum of the air conditioner and the distant sound of the ice cream truck.  Both of these I like to refer to as the cha ching of a cash register.

Someday, I’m going to invent a soundless blower and figure out how to install it on our air conditioning unit.  This way, I won’t hear the constant ringing up in my head as the temperatures continue to climb over 100 and the door to the house does the smuck and click.

Of course the ice cream man has to run his route to earn some money, which then causes more smuck and click, and then more humming from the air unit.  As if I can’t hear the mechanical music from a mile away, there has to come a screeching, “Hey Mom, can I buy some ice cream!” Note to those who aren’t at the ice cream truck stage:  You can purchase a box or sometimes two of popsicles or ice cream sandwiches from your local grocer for what it costs to buy one ice cream from the truck. I’ve gotten to where I allow the kids one purchase a month from the truck and just buy whatever is on sale at the store and share with the whole neighborhood.  I’m pretty sure I’m saving enough this way to put the teen through at least his first week of college.

Sometimes the queen can’t take the heat of the day any longer so she comes in to rest.  The resting never lasts long because there is always a knock (so excited I’ve gotten most of the neighbor kids to lay off the door bell) or a ding-dong, ding-dong, ding-dong.  Did I mention my husband sleeps during the day?  This then causes another smuck and click, a hum from the air unit, and me yelling about the air being on, how much it costs for the air to be on, and did you forget your dad is trying to sleep.

Oh yes, summer can be loud.  In my dreams, I can hear the sound of a big yellow bus rolling down our streets.

Rant About Crafts

I want to start this with how thankful I am to my grandmother, aunt, great granny, and babysitter who all took the time to teach me how to crochet.  I have enjoyed spending many hours stitching away.

Today the queen and I made a trip to the local craft mega store.  Me in search of some great yarn and the queen in search of whatever she could find for a $1.  We ended up in the pre-boxed craft aisle where there are so many kits and crafts to choose from.  The queen found a lovely weaving kit for $5.99.  Remember making potholders all those years ago?  That was my first enterprising experience.  I would create flyers with order forms (by hand, yes I’m that old), weave up a storm, and sell those crazy potholders for…are you ready for this….25 cents each.  Today this kit comes with the plastic loom, plastic hook (no more metal ones), and 75 loops.  We may have just enough to make one potholder.

Back in the day you could buy a huge bag of those loops.  Today you can buy a refill box for $5.99.  For some reason, it seems a little strange that 75 loops with the start-up materials and just 75 loops should differ in price…guess that BA in business wouldn’t apply to today’s business world.

As we continued to walk down the aisle I found a kit that will teach you how to crochet or knit for $19.99.  Seriously, one cardboard box with manual, hook, and little bits of yarn are going to teach young girls to crochet?  This kit supposedly included enough yarn to make a hat and a scarf (very nice set).  Making a scarf is a great beginners’ project (preferably all in one color) but the kit had at least four color changes.  Then there is the hat.  I’m pretty good with a hook and yarn but hats have a way of making me cuss–just ask my great-niece who is awaiting a matching hat to her sweater–she’s just two months old but may graduate from college before I get it right.  Additionally with a hat, you have to watch the tension of the stitches…too tight and it won’t fit a Barbie.  Maybe it is just me but it seems to me some scrap yarn or a skein of Red Heart is the way to start young ones on the path to needle crafts and for a lot less money and frustration.

We finally make our way to the cash register and the queen begins explaining to the cashier how she is going to make some potholders for her grandma.  The cashier then asks if we would like some information on craft camp.  Of course we would like that information.  As we make our way to the car, I begin to study the brochure to find it would cost $30 plus materials to take a three-hour course on how to crochet a dishcloth.  Come on, you have to be kidding me!  Did you know I can learn to knit or crochet at my local library for free?  Looking forward to late August when I can get some Number 7 needles and a ball of 100% cotton and try my hand at knitting (for free!!!).

We are now on the hunt for weaving loops.  Surely I can find them somewhere in lots of colors for less that $5.99.  Weaving should make for a great activity with temperatures hovering around 100.  Happy Fourth of July!!

Mom’s Got Game

As anyone who is a parent knows, getting a child to eat fruits and vegetables can become an all out battle every day, every meal.

Here is a conversation that took place at our house recently:

Queen:  Is that zucchini you are putting in the Crockpot?

Me:  Yes, it is.

Queen:  You do realize I’m allergic to zucchini?

Me:  Really?  Since when?

Queen:  Yep, the dentist told me at my last checkup.  Turns my teeth green.

Me.  That’s interesting because the dentist nor assistant shared this bit of info with me.

Queen:  Well, it’s the truth.

Fast forward a few days.  Just the queen and I are running errands and I just happen to have a check that needs to be dropped off at the dentist office.  Sure I could have mailed it but I really wanted to hit home on this whole zucchini business.

Me:  Hi Receptionist how are you today?

Receptionist:  Doing great!  What brings you all by the office today?

Me:  Thought I would drop off a payment and discuss the Queen’s allergies.

Receptionist:  Queen’s allergies (she is pulling up charts and skimming the screen)?

Me:  Yeah, seems the dentist told the queen she is allergic to zucchini and it will turn her teeth green.

Cue crickets chirping

Receptionist:  That’s crazy!  If anything I would think the dentist would say to eat zucchini.

Queen:  Yeah, it sounded good to me on the day my mom was fixing it.

Receptionist:  So, you thought it a good idea to use the dentist as a scapegoat?

Queen:  Yep and it still sounds like a great idea.

Receptionist:  It would be a good idea to eat more vegetables because it will make your teeth stronger.

Queen:  I still don’t like zucchini.

Receptionist:  See you in September!

Oh yeah, I’m feeling pretty good about this parenting moment.